I heard people whispering about Him in the African studies library. I heard a guy in the chicken burger queue say He met him once. At a dig party a clarendon 1st year was heard quoting to say he stays in the actual room as He did, and a carinus girl saying she drank from His crackling bottle. The stories of Him are countless... His name is Andrew.
The most recent story I overheard concerned a fight that broke out, probably at the tennis club. It was a mass brawl. Forty guys, shirts off, bare knuckles...old school. He entered the fray, 7 feet tall, (including hair) lightning bolts firing from his eyes, and fire balls from his arse. He came brandishing a buddy coke bottle and just one bottle of unopened Cape To Rio. He spoke to the masses, calming them, then He fed them. He fed them all. Every person drank their fill from the bottle as He offered it to their lips. They apologised to Him, and He forgave them...
The claremont riot police were astounded when they arrived to witness the calm flock of content people following their leader to the heavenly Tiger. Upon arrival He walked His flock, straight to the front of the queue and asked St John to let His people in. They all went in. He wept.
Funningly enough. He did not follow His people in but stayed outside. Those days of staying outside are gone now because He is 23 today and legally allowed to enter, plus this mysteriously and conveniently falls on the same day His 3 month ban is lifted...
No comments:
Post a Comment