Friday, June 29, 2007


When bad times get worse...

Okay so I am moaning about getting dragged to this model thing tonight and rightly so but unfortunately things have gotten worse. Apparently the thing doesn't kick off until 11pm so we have to find something to occupy ourselves before then..!

Supper at a place called Koi. Nice Japanese restaurant. Problem is the manager is ths worldly kinda guy with, and I quote, interesting proclivities and his policy is 'models at registered agencies eat sushi for free...'!


Good thing I don't have a taste for raw fish...

Hu(se) Bar..?

I think Bangkok was unfortunate to pick up such a heavy stigma of being the liberal hedonistic hub of South East Asia...so late in it's development! Since the world wars the involvement of the US Army in the business of everyone in Asia was extensive and Thailand was used as a launch point for air and sea attacks and for a relief point for the rest and relaxation of injured, and tired, soldiers.



The result of such a recipe sees us whip up a storm of a very westernised place, with strict eastern culture filled, with modernity and liberal ideas. Liberal puts it pretty lightly. Now Bangkok had some very dangerous stigmas built onto its worldwide appeal to travellers so from the early nineties the tourism department has taken huge steps to try rectify the demonic status it has amongst foreigners that aren't the scum of the earth.

The Bangkok of the 21st century is an incredible place with a heavy nightlife that rivals partying anywhere else in the world. However, it still has the place of old where anyone can venture here and lose themselves from their previous life.



I fortunately got invited to a model party tonight at Hu'u bar here! Great. However, on my way there I will be keeping an eye out for Theodore Bagwell complete with new hand and slave group of 13 year old boys...

Wednesday, June 27, 2007


4 week lights...

Some of us have holidays and then there are others that have real holidays. You can only really fall into the latter category if your trip starts with 12hours travel in an economy class airline seat with only a thin metal armrest separating you from belter...


The natural laws of preemption dictate that if you usually wish for something you end up not getting it. I stupidly asked to please sit next to a belter in an exclamation to a car carrying Jay, .9 and The Guv. They rightly pointed out there was no fuckin chance!


Well boys, it seems my four week trip to Thailand has evaded all laws of chance because I managed to get placed next to the hottest girl on the plane. She wasn't ugly..! I'll tell you about our stop over in singapore another time.

Monday, June 25, 2007

Monday Girl(s)



To make up for our lack of last week. Don't say we don't ever do anything for you.

Sunday, June 24, 2007

Mullet Watch ...

In a bid to outdo the already top class competition one travelling Rockstar has sent in this beautiful self portrait, all the way from South America, of a fully grown Afrikannse Mullet . I think that's the scientific name. Geniet dit.

Friday, June 22, 2007

Overworked...

If exams (and ensuing mandatory release period) don't serve as enough of an impediment to your personal aspirations you must understand that a full week of work squashes your social enthusiam like Mugabe would a social uprising.


I gave up my weeks allocation of time, enthusiam, choice of dress code and social life for the scant reward of a covering reference letter commending my vac work participation that I will one day use to flagship my CV.

I have little doubt that my week of practical experience will have positive repercussions for my career at some point in later life but for the moment the positive affects have been somewhat limited.

The only thing I got to show for it is a massive crush on my exceptionally sexy boss...

Monday, June 18, 2007

Karma Chameleon ...

I've recently been introduced to the idea of Karma. Not so much introduced as slammed face first into it. Those of you who don't have vodka with your cornflakes in the morning probably remember I mentioned taking a little jaunt on a 60 ft yacht for a week. Good times. So far, so good.

Now, I'm a good person - I pay my taxes (they're automatically deducted) I don't kick cripples etc etc (I'm running out of things to say here). If I were Catholic I'd be holding my hand out for Sainthood. As it is, I dedcided to take a week out of my busy schedule to go throw a few hands of poker, catch a tan and drink some Croatian beer. Imagine my surprise then when I arrived onboard he HMS Madonna with my posse (always wanted to say that) to find not the group of Swedish supermodels I expected but instead some remnant's o Noah's Ark. I tried to capture a few on camera for you but even on a wideangle lens I could only get the smallest 4.



After a while, we started running through what we had done to deserve such a fate. It turns out that mocking fat girls, being better than everyone else and not being afraid to tell them it don't qualify as being a nice person in some people's books. Now, at this stage I had to choose in following Earl's example in trying to rectify all the things I've done wrong. I gave this some serious thought, but in the end realised if it's taken 23 years for this catch up to me I should be fine for the next 23.

I did manage to bump into a couple of girls one night - didn't think you'd believe me so I got their autograph the morning after.



Screw Karma.

Monday, June 11, 2007


Monday...




There is something so hot about this girl and I can't really put my finger on it. However I would love to...

Friday, June 08, 2007


Most IMPORTANT Rugby News...

I find it fitting that we should update you with the MOST important rugby news for this weekend. Since you're mostly South African it will have to be the news that is most important to you! Yes boys and girls. The Springboks have a new cap this weekend v Samoa...

Sorry, I know you smoked Waylon Murray in matric Dutton but at least you've nearly (well kind of) got a degree and he has only achieved his national colours since school. However, we must remain mindful of the fact that you are the incumbent numer 10 for the Eagles..! You are walking in the corridors of greatest son, where a few rockstars have passed before you...


Friday girl..?

Don't get your excitement neurons all in a tussle just yet! No we are not considering doubling up on monday girl action (although we thoroughly condone double action) and entertaining you with a Friday girl now to keep you occupied over the weekend. We feel if you want a girl for the weekend, go get her yourself.


Instead we're jumping on the media bandwagon and associating ourselves with the hype around this year contender for the ladies title at Roland Garros. The jury is out on this girl as we are still undecided.


Is Ana hot?

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Repulika Hrvatska (Croatia)

As world weary as I am - I am nothing if not selfless. As such tomorrow I will (against my will) board a plane to Croatia. I tend to lump anything even vaguely East European in a basket carrying war, moustaches, really bad accents and blueberry muffins.

I have been assured by my Corporate Account, Gold Card weilding abductors that this is what I can expect on "my" luxury yacht.



And this.



We shall see. We. Shall. See.


Cops, robbers, cowboys and indians...

I find the distinction between fiction and reality has become increasingly blurred as with every day that passes I enjoy the latter less than the former. Alas, if only we could live our lives on linear timelines instead of this frog hopping from one time in the future to the present and back. I am not sure if that is a reality or not but whether you grasp my fictional tale or not, is!

I am presently mindful of this untrue reality as sure as one can believe a false fiction, since only yesterday one of our rockstar affiliates was forced into a life threatening situation.

Back in town for the equally life threatening situation of having to write the CFA exam, Thurston found room and bored (intended) in a lovely upmarket palatial palace set in the lush urban greenery of the lower rondebosch projects.

After successfully warding off the mortal certainty of CFA he has little else to do so passes his time by acquiring equally fatal hangovers and attempting to overcome those. No stranger to a death bed it seems fitting that the house he was residing in was under a current spate of lethal criminal activity. But underage non-consentual sex, shebeen-esque bootlegging and tik den fostering aside there was also a neighbourhood housebreaker on the prowl.

Our local perpetrator was a demonic cross between the nightfox and jack the ripper; a station strangler cousin of sorts, and his knife weilding escapades had been confronted twice in 3 days and were presumably linked to numerous schedule 1 offences.

On yesterday's fateful day the shadow of this man passed a bedroom window and the house mates were mobilized into action. Our hero, Thurston, unfortunately was too far down the digsmate hierarchy to lay first claim to weaponary from the digs arsenal and had to watch as the pepper spray and baseball bat were entrusted to digs captain and fearless leader Brad Chase. Since number 2 was in an exam his slightly build female cousin was ordained the protector of the fort and armed with her internal league hockey stick.

This left Thurston drowning in the shallow end of the weaponary box which could only muster a thickish wire coathanger as protection.

The Chase ensued:

Not restricted by fear, concern or brain power digs captain and fearless leader Brad Chase led the counter attack around the front of the house. Thurston and his trusty noisy cricket coathanger would be Shaka's bullhorn that would out flank the assailant from the back of the abode. Young slender female cousin would keep goal.

Digs captain and fearless leader Brad Chase's gusto fuelled malevolent battle cry spooked our not so friendly neighbourhood thief and he accelerated around the corners of the house like Alonso around the streets ofMonaco. Our unarmed Thurston was the finish line.

The old adage to never bring a knife to a gunfight is built on sensibility and foreseeable consequences, hence it can be extended to never bring a coathanger to a knife duel. On realising his error Thurston fled (fight or flight is not inherent as sometimes it is common sense). Thurston fled and Mack the knife pursued.

Mack cornered Thurston between the refuse bins and the locked garage door whilst the negihbours watched in horror from their patio. Defenceless against the 15inches of Hattaori Hanzo steel Thurston gulped in anticipation of digs captain and fearless leader Brad Chase to turn his battle cry into action and come charging around the corner to his rescue.

He was no where to be seen...

Instead the faithful slender built female cousin of digsmate no 2 came brandishing her compisite Gryphon astropole and fought off the blade carrying attacker.

Moral of the story: When you are staring death in the eye and you can do little through self agency to help you look in the little places for help and not in the big ones.


Epilogue: As it turned out digs captain and fearless leader Brad Chase was unable to save our brave Thurston as after he let out his boorish battlecry he let off a two second cloud of pepper spray as a sign he meant business but alas directed it straight into his own running path from which it was too late for him to steer away. Whilst slender hockey girl saved Thurston's life digs captain and fearless leader Brad Chase was left staggering around under the mulberry tree wiping a murky film of reality liquid from his eyes...

Monday, June 04, 2007

Venezuelan Monday ...

I have it on good authority that Venezuela is where I'm going to be taking my next vacation. With the cheapest plastic surgery in the world, more Miss World titles than any other country and an unfair ratio of women to men (60:40) what's not to love. On that note, please welcome Miss Venezuela 2006 - Federica Gúzman, who somehow managed to win Miss World Beach Body 2006. God knows how.



See you in Venezuela. Apparently there's pretty good beaches too.