Ruck-by...

I am so abhorrently affected by every sports page in SA media that my stomach involuntary convulses every time I just see a headline about the world champion´s pending test against the Welsh.

Furthermore, a conversation with an erudite rockstar reader friend of mine yesterday yielded an interesting point regarding sport reporting in the Western Cape. He pointed out that since the Cape Times has a history of liberal thought and provocative journalism they publish every article from the perspective of controversy, created or otherwise. My old favourite Ashfrak is the watermark of awful rugby opinion. He somehow twists any news snippet into a 3rd force conspiracy mainly implying a glass ceiling holding down black players, coaches and writers.

Lovely, Ash, now please try substantiate how from your discovery that all the Sharks players in the Springbok camp drink only from the orange energade bottles you proposition that Earl Rose is being held back from his professional stardom based purely on the colour of his skin rather than the fact that he weighs 62kg and openly mixture brandewyn with his powerade before the Lions v Hurricans game?

Everyone around me has a big break, where is mine?

Sorry I digress, the major sports gripe that has squeezed me by the balls over the last two weeks is how every rugby writer insists on giving the team he thinks Pieter D will announce today. It has been the source of much annoyance for me that these little fuckers get paid to sit in and watch the Boks practice and then based on who is holding contact shields formulate their prospective starting 15. No wonder they end up writing conspiracy articles.

Well, fuck em, I am joining in. Here is the most probable side PD will announce today. I base this purely on form throughout recent times:

15 Tiger Mangweni - Back of the Vodacom Cup virtually plus loads of experience.
14 JP Pietersen - form irrelevant he has a RWC medal
13 Adi Jacobs - shows he has the mettle to step up for big games, like the Super 14 semi final.
12 Earl Rose - Thinking like the Kiwis here. Every good flyhalf should be able to play first-5 plus an additional pivot takes pressure off 10.
11 An Ndungane - Picks himself
10 Isma-eel Dollie - VC
9 Bolla Conradie - we are in a crisis here, but he was far better than Kockott in the S14, made far fewer errors, and starts...
8 Ashley Johnson - Great Brain.
7 Hylton Lobberts - Less Yellow cards than Schalk.
6 Schalk Brits - need a fetcher.
5 Ross Skeate - The tall timber.
4 Johan Ackerman - The old timber.
3 Ollie Le Roux - I don´t pick foreign home based players so no Beast.
2 Luke Watson - best black hooker we have.
1 Oregan Hoskins - loosest head in the world...

And in other news...

How main would it be to be so good at what you do that your employer bends the rules for you. The New Zealand Rugby Union and Graham Henry have a strict policy that doesn´t allow foreign based players to play for the All Blacks. Unless you are the world´s best. Danny Carter is allowed to go on a sabbatical next year.


He can play overseas instead of winning another Super 14 for the Crusaders and can then return to play in the Tri-nations. The powers that be that grant such an allowance will do so on the determination of the following factors: the number of tests he has played and the commitment he has shown to the country! Strangely they omit how fuckin good he is as a criteria!

I do find this hilarious but am actually not criticising it. It is a far more progressive approach and I think it is a great idea. This compared to say, making a black and white ban after all your RWC winners sign overseas contracts, and then revoking the ban momentarily before reinstating it subject to the provisio that the coach can only choose 4 players. That is not progressive in the least...

This weekends games:

All Blacks v Ireland 09h35 SA time.
Springboks v Wales 15h00 SA time.