Julius's seizure...

Dont you find it funny how when people get stuck in the mud they manage to do zero in the efforts to escape their quagmire but no just thrash about and get further sucked into their predicament. If public outcry was kicking for polls Julius Malema would be be the illegitimate son of Dan Carter's mom, Johny Wilkinson's dad that was bought up under the watchful eye of Ronaldinho grandmother in some Rio valley side slum town...

Skilled..!

The whole predicament Malema's tongue got him into, wasn't given its full justice when I posted about it the other day. Here are some facts:

• He decided that as his days of youth are nearing an end he decided to fully commit his life, along with the life of his comrades, and of course the blood of his enemies to the freedom cause that is Jacobs Zuma's pending criminal trial.

• His hero JZ denounced him as a bit of a scallywag although actually used the word hoodlum. Whether he meant hooligan or hoodlum remains to be seen. I hope he meant the former, which makes him a scoundrel inner city English soccer chav. (Google Wayne Rooney's kids in two years time for the image) as opposed to the latter, which is the endearing term for human rights activists who downed their black gloves in exchange for the crystal meth trade and cristal lifestyle of inner city gangsters across America.

• Patrick De Lille from the Independent Democrats officially complained to the Human Rights Commission citing Malema's words as inflammatory hate speech. I think the pray for his sanction to be a knife fight with Mcebisi Skwatsha a little limited and hope the alternate pray of the enforcement of Mandoza as Malema's personal driver from now on more suited. Since the majority of the HR Commission lives above 33^rd street in LA the decision may take longer than the honourable Judge Hlophe's JSC review, although thankfully not longer than JZ's criminal trial.

• Malema's threat to spill blood made reference to the action he seeks to take if the State pressed on with the impending fraud and corruption trial of JZ. He thinks the country could not afford to have a president in court on a criminal charge. In a recent rockstar poll 95% of the world agree that this would be unsavoury and so JZ shouldn't be president. (the other 5% were in space, and as with Zimbabwe you can't vote unless you vote ZanuPF, and by that I mean you're on this planet) Please be weary of these statistics (we are very weary from them) as they although they include all of the 6 billion plus people on earth they exclude the ANC electorate as they were on long-leave and vacation with all their elected Parliamentary members.

• Malema has refused to retract his statement despite the HR complaint and JZ calling him a doos.

• Malema is a doos.

• In fact Malema reiterated his statement saying "the ANCYL was prepared to kill these tendencies, that manifest themselves in the form of trying to undermine the leadership of the black majority". We wish him luck, especially in the face of the fact that killing corruption is very tricky. Corruption is a resourceful predator in the creature kingdom and even managed to kill all the Scorpions.

• I particularly enjoyed this snipped from Malema: "there are counter-revolutionary forces hellbent on the undermining of the ANC leadership!" Very intriguing. So if the ANC is the majority as he stated earlier, and they face the opposition of 'counter-revolutionary' forces, then that implies the ANC is currently waging a revolution. Who might I ask are the majority revolting against. Sure the majority may well be revolting in the way they say deliver basic human services but why are they revolting in the French sense. The only plausible explanation to turn his hogcrap into anything sensible would be that the revolution he refers to is the corruption drive of the minority of the majority power which just also happens to be the head of the party.

• Maybe it is unfair to lump the ANCYL with the ANC then. Shame, damage done though.

• The coup de grace (since we're embroiled in revolutionary nomenclature) of Malema was this "the remarks were in the interests of freedom and democracy".

• Conclusion: Someone needs to explain to Julius the meaning of these words, freedom and democracy. I am away so have a very far pressing interests but would suggest maybe the Preamble of the Constitution. Crumbs, whilst he is there he might as well peruse the whole document.

I look forward to Malema's keynote speech next week when he headlines the Previously Disadvantaged Indaba that is being held in Beijing, I mean Queenstown, I mean Chinatown...