Lesbians ...

As contributing editor of the Journals, I tend to do more editing than contributing. And quite frankly, very little of both at times. Take for instance, right now. I should probably be regaling you with tales of the very recently attended Full Moon Party on Koh Phangan island which may well be one of the most commercially successful drug binges in the world. I can't of course, because I don't remember anything. Yet ... but I'm sure it'll come back to me.

What I am going to do is run you through a quick argument I've been having with myself lately. namely lesbians. Incidentally, I won the argument.

Now the argument runs as follows, non-lesbian females are attracted to me. I mean, attracted to men. Ergo, by definition, lesbians are attracted to women. I think our Monday Girls have probably given you some idea as to why certain women swing this way. Hell, if the criteria for being a lesbian is liking women, I'm the biggest damn one.

So point 1. Lesbians like women. Can't go wrong there. There is a certain appeal. Namely T&A. And personality, of course. Please examine exhibit number 1.


Aha, but I hear you cry - you're wrong the Whip. You're wrong because the only lesbians I see look like mechanics, plumbers and other tradesmen types so masculine they make my balls crawl up inside of me. This is however, the crux of the argument. By definition, lesbians like women. They like the womanly things about women. They do not like men (unfortunately, less for me and you)

Women who date 'women' who look more like men than any man has a right to, are dykes. Not that that's a bad thing. They happen to have a annual NYC Dyke March. Just a matter of definition. So next you throw the word lesbian around, do it with a bit of care lads. Words hurt. And who would ever want to hurt Marrissa Cooper's feelings?



DISCLAIMER: This article is fully intended as a joke. I offer my sincere apologies should you take any offense and suggest, respectfully, that you probably shouldn't be reading this website. My representative can be reached for comment on the above supplied email address