Firstly I am not taking any credit for this merge of religious holidays that is Christmukkah. I bow down to Seth Cohen superior holiday ingenuity but am happy to perpetuate the idea whilst swigging eggnog, opening presents (hopefully a nano), making snow angels (hopefully if it snows) and mainlining mince pies.
I am spending this year in the USA as most of you know and they really just take it to a different level than I have ever experienced. It’s pretty fuckin awesome. Outrageous lights on every house, trees bigger than linebackers and with more decorations than a joburg chick in first period, radio channels have dedicated their playlists exclusively to xmas carols and I even saw a reindeer, although I am in the South and it was lying on the side of the road looking fairly unhealthy…actually it could have been just a big ass possum.
However, I am extremely lucky in that this year in the States they tried to de-Christianize the commercial side of this time of year and stores were forced to take down their ‘Merry Christmas’ banners, and replace them with the more inclusive, non-denominational ‘Happy Holidays’. What a joke! Damn man, you don’t need to be Christian to buy cool things to give to friends and family, and you certainly don’t have to be Christian to accept it. I am atheist and I love getting stuff. (there is also a certain girl out there that will vouch that I also love giving but lets not digress)
This commercial swing they are trying to stage is pretty ironic though cause even if you do succeed in replacing every Walmart Xmas sign with ‘Happy Holidays’ you haven’t achieved much. A little research into the background of the word ‘holiday’ will have you find that it originates from “Holy Day” which…err…is also Christian. Oops…
Moving along, I do have that overwhelming Xmas feeling but it may just be the eggnog and this rad reindeer sweater. Anyways, I just wanted to wish all your rockstars and your respective families out there a wonderful, safe, and awesome Christmukkah…
-------------------Voted most sought after gift this xmas...
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